March 2005

Healing my “allergies” has been one of the seeds I have been nurturing this spring. The journey of self-discovery began with a medical intuitive in Toronto who sensed allergies, which we later confirmed with hair analysis.

Being a lover of cream, cheese and pasta, I was reluctant to embrace eliminating gluten and dairy but resolved to change the way I ate. Food was a physical manifestation, and like all dis-ease, there were emotions to tackle as well.

So while I worked at finding a great rice-bread recipe, my spirit wanted assistance with the big picture and called on the talents of a wonderful channeler outside Ottawa. The first suggestion by the benevolent energy was to renew my relationship with the creator everyday: “As your eyes open on the day say — good morning Creator.” This has increased the intimacy of our relationship, and helped me feel that I am existing within creation rather than an enthusiastic spectator.

We also looked at past life stories that were playing themselves out this lifetime, and their emotional patterns, which I was reacting to and working on this life again. The stories of my past lives were evocative and often had me crying in recognition. It would have had a similar impact for someone less comfortable with the notion of past lives, because the stories feel so personal, and set bells ringing as you recognize yourself in heroic tales.

Being poor and without food and struggling to survive, for example, I find heroic. The theme of struggle, for myself this life, appeared to be the merging of two streams or sets of lifetimes. In one stream the struggle has been with injustice, and responding to it appropriately. The other series has been spiritual and loving. This lifetime I am merging those worlds so that the loving being can work with the injustices life can offer, and transform them with compassion and love.

I had gotten sick in other lifetimes when I was unfairly judged or punished, and this was being played out again.

So the next phase of understanding my allergies was to become more intimate with Creator to work with that energy to revisit the “unfair” or unjust events in my life, and to understand them with compassion, thus setting them free.

Meanwhile, I took advantage of knowing brilliant health practitioners, who guided me on vitamins, homeopathics and aromatherapy that would begin the deep work of rebuilding my immune system. I am also working with a Toronto acupuncturist from Beijing who has begun draining the excessive dampness and/or dryness accumulated in my body from years of eating inappropriate foods, and healing my lungs from smoking damage. Paying all this attention to myself was quickly rewarded. I felt myself getting stronger and was rewarded with a richly symbolic life, full of information about where my focus has been in the past that no longer served, as well as how and where I could focus and feel most rewarded.

If my nose was stuffed up I was operating from the past, and when I could breathe I acknowledged what was different in habits and attitude.

When I was ready, a healer and elder in the community here, rich with spirit allies, created an opportunity for “letting go.” As her spirit helpers “sucked” old emotions out of my body and an eagle swept me clean, what was left required viewing my life with the compassion of Creator. The characters who played the “bad guys,” by co-creating a feeling of injustice, appeared before me and were filled with deep love for me. I knew they had loved me since life was formed in the universe and all my experiences were opportunities for using love and compassion to heal my anger at injustice. As I rose from her table I knew the emotional source of the allergies was gone.

Sure enough the acupuncture is now able to do more in less time, and I can occasionally get away with a little creamy dessert and not suffer too great a consequence as my body deals gets stronger and recovers from years of emotional malaise. So this is a year of nurturing my body and my friendship with creator, which after all, just means making better friends with myself.

Epilogue: There is a tendency for a follow up “test” to be sure you got the lesson. Mine was around a parking ticket. It was snowing and I couldn’t see the markings on the road to indicate that part of my car was sitting over a handicap parking space. I received a $300 parking ticket in a town where you don’t have to pay for parking. I heard myself say “that’s so unfair” and realized this was not just a ticket. So I looked up the number 300, which means “you are connected to source, do your higher life work.”

As I drove to town I chatted away with Creator about how this was an opportunity to see this injustice as a loving lesson, an opportunity in this lifetime to be heard, and that once I was heard the lesson would no longer be necessary (i.e. the ticket). I got to the parking office and they asked me to write a “story” about why I felt the ticket was unjust. I did, and the ticket was cancelled the next day.